VIDEOS
Christ the King Parish Lenten Morning of Reflection.
Change our Hearts, Lord
Receiving a new heart through Lenten practices of Prayer, Fasting and Almsgiving.
with Rev. Kevin J. O'Neil, C, Ss. R.
San Alonso Retreat House, Long Branch, NJ

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FIVE VIDEO SEGMENTS ARE AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE. JUST CLICK TO WATCH!
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Here is Father O'Neil's outline handout.

CONFERENCE #1: Introduction
Symbolism of the Heart
Where are our hearts today?
Conversion = becoming our true selves as made in the image and likeness of God = to be receivers and givers of love
Experience of a Divided Heart (St. Paul in Romans 7:15; St. Augustine)
Why do we open our hearts to be changed?
- Fear? It will not last
- Love transforms hearts for the long haul (Luke 19: 1-10 – Zacchaeus; Mark 10: 17-31: “Jesus looked on [the rich young man] with love.”
We pray to be touched by love and changed by love.

Questions for reflection:
Was there a time in my life when fear moved me to change? When love moved me to change? What is in my heart today as I come before the Lord?

CONFERENCE # 2: Opening Our Hearts to Our Deepest Longings through Fasting
Fasting – an ancient practice in religious and non-religious settings
What has been your experience of fasting? Positive? Negative? Obligation? Valued spiritual practice?

Various purposes for fasting found in Scripture:
a) a desire to placate a wrathful God; b) a practice when “grave calamities” occurred; c) when the people were in imminent danger; d) to obtain benefits from the Lord; e) to make up for the sins of others; f) a discipline of holiness, to dedicate oneself more fully to God

Lenten Practice of Fasting: always about our relationship to God and a change of heart in us. Also, fasting is not just about letting go of something but also taking something else up. In this sense, like “penance” in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. It should mark a new path in our lives.

Fasting = feeling hunger for something less significant in order to tap into a deeper hunger
Distinction between types of desire: “desire as felt need” and “vital desire” (see Sebastian Moore, Jesus, the Liberator of Desire)

Story of the teacher with a jar, representing life. What do we put into it?

Lent is a time to reflect on what we feed on, what nourishes us
Suggestion for Lent: Fast from certain memories
Remembering and forgetting mercy: Matthew 18: 21-35
“The best way to begin to talk about forgiveness is not to tell folks to forgive their enemies. That’s hard, as the beginning point. First let them think about how much forgiveness God has granted them from their childhood up to this level of maturation. They have had to make withdrawals from the bank of grace many, many times.”
- Rev. James Forbes, from the DVD The Power of Forgiveness

“Forgiveness allows us to actually let go of the pain in the memory. And if we let go of the pain in the memory, we can have the memory but it doesn’t control us . . . . When memory controls us, we are then the puppets of the past.” - The Power of Forgiveness

Conclusion: Lent is a time for Learning what to let go of and what to cling to

Questions for reflection:
What has been my own experience of fasting? In reflecting on my life now, what might I want to fast from in order that the deeper hungers of my life are satisfied (hunger for God, hunger for a deeper relationship with family and friends, hunger for reconciliation with a family member or friend, hunger to be of service to my brothers and sisters)? What practical steps might I take in this regard?

Conference # 3: Opening Our Hearts to God and Others through Prayer and Almsgiving
Prayer
1. Prayer as conversation with God
ACTS = adoration, contrition, thanksgiving, supplication
Ann Lamott: Help, Thanks, Wow (what’s missing is “Sorry)

2. Prayer as Listening to God’s Word/Remembering Images of God
Letting the Word of God touch our hearts:
Isaiah 49: 15: “Can a mother forget her child . . . . I will never forget you.”
Isaiah 49: 16: “See, upon the palms of my hands I have written your name.”
Hosea 11: 3: : “When Israel was a child I loved him, and called my son out of Egypt…. And I taught Ephraim how to walk, taking them by their arms.
Jeremiah 31: “With age old love have I loved you. So I have kept my mercy toward you.”
John 3: 16: “God so loved the world that he sent his only Son.”

Letting Images of God touch our hearts:
The Prodigal Father – extravagantly reckless with his love
Other images?

3. Prayer as Resting in God/Stillness before God
Sr. Wendy Beckett offers the painting Craigie Aitchison called “Boat.”

She writes:
. . . We feel the waters are not geographical.
This boat sails on no specific sea, but on those mythic waters that have always been our image of the mysterious unknown of living. This is not an earthly sky, any more than this is an earthly sea. The small boat, its sail taut, does not reveal who is within it. Below our curious gaze, the sailor lies hidden. This boat that seemingly sails by itself can be seen to speak of prayer.
When we pray, we are likewise carried, borne along by a power that we do not and cannot direct. It is our prayer, our boat. It is we who have launched it on this sea of faith and we who stay quiet within it. But all the movement comes from God. We await Him, we surrender to Him (pages 35-36).

Prayer to close reflection on prayer:
You Have Called Me by Name
Joseph Tetlow, S.J.
Oh, Lord my God,
You called me from the sleep of nothingness
merely because in your tremendous love
you want to make good and
beautiful beings.
You have called me by name in my
mother’s womb.
You have given me breath and light
and movement
and walked with me every moment of
my existence.
I am amazed, Lord God of the universe,
that you attend to me and, more,
cherish me.
Create in me the faithfulness that
moves you,
and I will trust you and yearn for you
all my days.
Amen.

Almsgiving
“To pray is not to step outside history and withdraw to our own private corner of happiness. When we pray properly we undergo a process of inner purification which opens us up to God and thus to our fellow human beings as well.”
- Pope Benedict XVI, In Hope We Are Saved, # 31

Poem by Peter Maurin of The Catholic Worker (1933)
People who are in need
and are not afraid to beg
give to people not in need
the occasion to do good
for goodness sake.
Modern society calls the beggar
bum and panhandler
and gives him the bum's rush.
But the Greeks used to say
that people in need
Are ambassadors of the gods.
Although you may be called
bums and panhandlers
You are in fact the ambassadors of God.
As God's ambassadors
you should be given
food, clothing and shelter
by those who are able to give it.
(quoted in Ron Rolheiser, Forgotten among the Lilies, p. 233)

Stories of “almsgiving” changing hearts
Putting our almsgiving in a larger context:
“We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction
of the magnificent enterprise that is God's work. 
Nothing we do is complete, which is a way of saying
that the kingdom always lies beyond us.
. . . This is what we are about.
We plant the seeds that one day will grow.
We water seeds already planted,
knowing that they hold future promise.

We lay foundations that will need further development.
We provide yeast that produces far beyond our capabilities.

We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation
in realizing that. This enables us to do something,
and to do it very well. It may be incomplete,
but it is a beginning, a step along the way,
an opportunity for the Lord's grace to enter and do the rest.” - Archbishop Oscar Romero

Questions for reflection:
How does my prayer foster a deep sense of the love of God for me? How does my prayer reflect my love back to God? Can I think of a particular moment in prayer where I was overwhelmend with God’s love for me? What was it like? What else was going on at the time that might have contributed to my heart being open to this experience?

How has my prayer moved me to compassion for others? Has it been my experience that loving God has encouraged me to make God’s loves and concerns my own? Do I have a personal experience where my heart was changed through an act of compassion and almsgiving?

CONCLUSION

Commit to conversion and be patient with oneself in the process of conversion
“Believe me, as a parent’s tender, affectionate admonishment carries far more weight with his child than does anger and sternness, so, when we judge our own heart to be guilty, if we treat it gently, rather in a spirit of pity than anger, encouraging it to make amends, our repentance will be much deeper and more lasting than it would be if it were stirred up by vehemence and wrath. . . .
So then, when you have fallen, lift up your heart quietly, humbling yourself deeply before God for your frailty, without marveling that you fell, since there is no cause to marvel because weakness is weak, infirmity, infirm, and frailty, frail. Sincerely regret that you should have offended God, and begin anew to seek the grace you need, with a very deep trust in God’s mercy, and with a bold, brave heart.”
- St. Francis de Sales

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